My last post on here was dated November 5, 2015.. I told you all the wonderful news of Jordan’s test results coming back as “much improved” and that I wasn’t going to take any more breaks from writing my story. I just knew that God had a plan for us and I couldn’t wait to continue sharing our story..
Then my brother and sister-in-law announced they were pregnant..and then not long after that they had lost their sweet little baby.
My last saved post on here was dated November 18, 2015…I was halfway writing it when I closed my computer, sat the computer down and until just now, stopped blogging. I was tired of writing about nothing but sad and devastating situations going on in my family..
Now here I am writing… one last post in this blog..
In February 2016, Jordan and I decided that we would just stop trying for a baby. We were tired of the heartbreak. We decided that if we didn’t magically become pregnant by August of 2016, we would start looking into getting IVF. We were especially heartbroken during this time because my sister-in-law, just two months previously, told me of a dream she had. She said she saw this green statue with the words “For this baby we have prayed in October” written on it. Besides Jordan and God, no one knew how desperately I wanted an October baby. I know that sounds silly when you have been trying for three years to have a baby, but I wanted a baby born in the fall. It was just a desire of mine that I kept to myself because of how ridiculous it sounded. But..here comes my sister-in-law telling me this dream. I just knew right then and there that God told her I would be pregnant by February because that would give me my long desired October baby…
Then February came…
Now although all of this sounds like it’s going to be a sad story, believe me, it’s not.
On February 28th, I remember looking at my husband as he walked from the kitchen and saying, “I think I’m pregnant.” Now that seemed silly to the both of us at the time, but I thought about the way I felt that day for the next 2 weeks. I couldn’t shake that feeling.
On Friday, March 11, 2016, I was heading to work as usual. I turned on the radio as I was pulling into Dunkin’ Donuts to get a coffee only to hear the man on the other end say that today is the day that the fountains in Savannah turn green ( I live near Savannah, if you were wondering). Savannah is known for their St. Patricks Day Parade and the fountains always turn green, along with the statues within those fountains, every single year one week before St. Patricks Day. My immediate thought went back to my sister-in-law’s dream…The statue was green. I paid for my coffee and for the person behind me (for good measure) haha. I drove to work and pulled into the Walgreens across the street to buy a pregnancy test. I had no symptoms of being pregnant and my cycle wasn’t supposed to start for 4 more days…but I couldn’t shake this feeling! I purchased the tests ($17 by the way..holy moly Walgreens), got in my car and drove to work. I remember talking to myself and saying that I would just wait until tomorrow to test so that I could get the FMU, especially testing this early. Then I remember telling myself that I just wasted $17 and that it’s probably just a stupid feeling.. then it happened.
For 3 years, every single time I would go to take a pregnancy test, I would ask God to just tell me if I was pregnant or not as I waited for those lines to show up..Every time I heard the words no. Sure enough, I never was. This day was different. I heard God say yes.
I ran inside, clocked in and immediately went to the bathroom, pregnancy test in hand.
All I could do was sob when the test in my hand immediately showed two pink lines.
If you deal with infertility, you know how you make all these plans to tell your spouse that you are pregnant each month? I had so many ideas before this moment! Instead I called him, asked him to go somewhere private and sent him this picture. He called me sobbing..it was perfect!
The bracelet that I have that says baby ball was a bracelet made by a wonderful friend one week prior purchased in faith! How great is our God!
I ran into the office, told my coworkers that I had to go and I left! I drove home, took the second test and once it came back positive, Jordan and I were off. We drove home and told our families and it was just the most perfect day! I can still remember the joy as if it was yesterday..
Over the next nine months, I allowed the enemy to get inside my head.. I thought something was going to go wrong the entire pregnancy..I was wrong. I let Satan steal my joy over a perfect pregnancy..I am sad about that. What I’m not sad about is that November 17, 2016, Jordan and I welcomed the most beautiful and perfect baby girl, Charlee Elizabeth Ball..1 year and 1 day after my last saved blog post.
To make things even sweeter, my brother and his wife welcomed a beautiful baby girl, Hadley Grace Wilcox, on December 19, 2016. Two sweet miracles get to grow up together!
As I sit here and watch my beautiful little girl play with her daddy on the floor, I can’t help but smile at the way God works things out for the good in our lives. He takes devastation and makes our wildest dreams come true if we trust Him to do so.
This new journey in life has taught me so much..but one thing stands out more than most.
God loves me more than I love her..and that’s more love than I can even fathom..